What I thought about Mel Robbins

9 million copies of Let Them sold, and Mel Robbins chose Auckland to start her tour, with two sold-out evenings. I headed along to the first, not at all surprised at how many women I knew in the crowd!

Women walked the streets with purpose as they filed towards the new International Convention Centre at SkyCity. Te PaePae theatre seats over 2800 people, and the smell of new vinyl and the crispness of the fabric on the new seats was evident. 

The ushers didn’t know the seating layouts any better than any of us, and it took more than 15 minutes for everyone to file in, during which time a Mel Robbins look alike took to the stage with volume. I have to admit I found this tedious. The 7.30pm start time actually meant... doors opening at 7.25pm. Mel didn’t hit the stage until 7.50pm. I just wanted the theatrics to stop so we could get started. I was tired (anyway else usually in bed by 8pm?!). 

Cue the dramatic video, lights, and Mel’s arrival. For nearly two hours, Mel held the stage with humour and drama, with an almost flawless execution of her presentation. 

She acknowledged those who had come alone. She acknowledged those who had been dragged along. 

She acknowledged menopause and going through stages of hating your husband and not being able to get out of bed. Of the impacts of poor communication, and having to look at ourselves to do better. 

Of taking control of our lives and not falling into the dangerous pit of expecting anything from anyone. Of consistently doing the things that take us closer to our goals, action, action action, 

After sharing some of her story from broke and broken to multi-millionaire, Mel bought on her daughter and co-writer of the Let Them theory, Sawyer to share the story of how they wrote the book.

This was the bit I was interested in. Since booking my tickets last year, I’d become aware that Mel had been accused of plagiarizing a poem called Let Them and turning it into her book. Written by Cassie Phillips the poem is called Let Them and it "promotes emotional healing, self-worth, and acceptance. It advises letting go of the need to control others' actions, encouraging readers to allow people to show their true nature and walk away, fostering personal peace and self-belonging."

Sound familiair? Mel Robbins allegedly found the poem and made a TikTok about it, seemingly loving the concept. She then trademarked it and wrote her latest book, so the story goes. Evidence is scarce but the claims are persistent. 

Mel says she didn’t, Cassie says she did. Maybe Mel and Sawyer detailing their writing process through a number of skits and reiterating that they wrote 11 complete drafts, is their way of saying, 'of course it’s our own original idea’. Maybe Mel could have acknowledged Cassie and then built on the work. I don’t know, and I don’t have the spoons to go into it. But I am wary. 

I am also aware that I am seeing an increasing backlash against the ‘self-help guru’. I’ve seen claims about them being harmful, being scammers, ‘grifters’ and Trump/Epstein supporters. Again, I don’t have the time and energy to go into this stuff but obviously over 5000 people -mostly women- paid over $100, to see this woman. They arrived smartly dressed, some clutching their green books, and filled a gorgeous new theatre. (Shout out to the generously sized seats - I loved how uncrowded this space felt. I was at the back and had a full view of the stage, and I didn’t feel my neighbour once. Yuuss!). 

Despite the Mel Robbins look alike, the loud (and good!) music, I was surprised at how unresponsive the crowd had largely been - there were some woops and cheers and claps, but largely it was low energy. Was everyone else tired? Or was Mel seeking concert hype without the vibe?

At the door we were handed green notebooks - always a nice touch. ‘Get your notebooks out’ said Mel. “Did you think you weren't going to be doing the work?”

And she proceeded to deliver thoughtful questions and asked the audience to answer, right then and there. “Yes, use your phone lights,’ she said, because obviously in the planning no one had thought that the dark theatre might inhibit note taking. 

I was impressed with my notetaking in the dark. I wrote down some notes around communication. At the end, Mel spoke about a couple of professors who created the Odyssey Plan. She revealed she’d already delivered 2 of the 3 questions, and now we were going to the third. 

As the first hour went, there were some technical issues. At one point, Mel lost sound, this was quickly remedied. The sound in the theater was crisp. The main screen flicked on and off multiple times as the evening went on. The acting and skits were starting to wear thin, it was increasingly feeling scripted (it was, Sawyer was looking down at the prompter a lot) and and without new content, I was getting tired. 

That third question? Mel had everyone write it down (yep, in the dark. Maybe they should have handed out UV pens). And then… ‘rip that paper out’. She had everyone fold the paper - and then pass it to someone you don’t know. And pass it again. And again. Everyone sat down with a paper that wasn’t theirs. Read it, she uninstructed, and go home and hold onto someone's dream. It seemed like a nice high-energy touch to finish. 

At the end, there was a shower of glitter and as everyone filed out, there was another video. It was actually a highlight - a montage of those beautiful human moments of joy, a call to action to live a beautiful life. 

As I listened to the chatter of women in the foyer everyone was raving. Everyone felt energetic.

2800 well dressed women went out into the night. The social media posts went up. I've seen a few across my screens, the writers enthusiastic with Mel's performance and her message. 

The learning that Mel shares (whether it's her ideas or not) is helping women to live better lives - and that is a win.